By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
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