I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Those nachos came to me in a dream
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
