It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
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We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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