We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
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I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
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I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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