I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
