she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
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He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
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There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
soo... how was my night?
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