I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
