i think my tv is drunk
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize