i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
