you win again, gameday.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
