Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
