Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize