she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
