that's an acceptable place to lick
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
