Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
