What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check