Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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