The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
