Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Randomize
