hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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