there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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