Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Randomize