so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
