$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
