She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize