i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
