When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
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my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
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First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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