There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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