just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
and you fell through a lawn chair
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
