I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
