Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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