margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
