he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
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Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
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trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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