Where are you?
In a non slutty way
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.