Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
we're so committed to being not committed
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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