HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
