Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Drunk walkin through police station. America
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
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