i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
