I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
