Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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