Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
he shaved USA in his pubs
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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