What a fucking waste of an outfit
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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