I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
People in love make me want to vomit
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize