4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize