How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
