I think my vagina is haunted
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
