I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
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I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
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sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.