Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (951): View more from California

  Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?

  (949): View more from California

  Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.

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  (951): Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn? (949): Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER. http://tfl.nu/x4x0
  Replies (29) Good night (1046) Bad night (3849)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!

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  (703): I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww! http://tfl.nu/rzts
  Replies (89) Good night (843) Bad night (13774)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs

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  (925): I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs http://tfl.nu/k9ok
  Replies (13) Good night (704) Bad night (4088)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.

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  (203): Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more. http://tfl.nu/bcah
  Replies (31) Good night (5452) Bad night (1123)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow

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  (402): I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow http://tfl.nu/h8bi
  Replies (10) Good night (1648) Bad night (4138)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol

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  (920): it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol http://tfl.nu/j58z
  Replies (4) Good night (2885) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?

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  (704): Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year? http://tfl.nu/w9x5
  Replies (6) Good night (3788) Bad night (1000)
• Favorite

  (575): View more from New Mexico

  If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong

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  (575): If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong http://tfl.nu/8y01
  Replies (12) Good night (727) Bad night (4965)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?

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  (407): Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives? http://tfl.nu/s936
  Replies (22) Good night (3676) Bad night (935)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.

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  (707): At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon. http://tfl.nu/h8sp
  Replies (3) Good night (1151) Bad night (1255)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street.  Hello 29...

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  (614): Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. ?Hello 29... http://tfl.nu/5t6y
  Replies (3) Good night (673) Bad night (1110)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts

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  (715): i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts http://tfl.nu/loq4
  Replies (10) Good night (2137) Bad night (596)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater

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  (717): Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater http://tfl.nu/z0ly
  Replies (3) Good night (402) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.

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  (850): Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids. http://tfl.nu/dauy
  Replies (5) Good night (1229) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.

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  (803): Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know. http://tfl.nu/qron
  Replies (1) Good night (293) Bad night (519)

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