I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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