yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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