Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
even my farts smell like vagina
it's great music for shaving your balls
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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